Thursday, November 5, 2009
Steak House or Gay Bar
http://www.steakhouseorgaybar.com/
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Yankees Win Tom Sweet Peter Lugers Steak! Grant Rogers is my Hero!


Hey Grant, thanks in advance for the final awesomeness of buying me one last steak dinner this season for winning the division! Yanks are 5-0 in the post season and A-Rod, Jeter and the boys are on fire! We'll rate Lugers one last time this season and compare them to the other top steak houses from our tour. Strip House and Wolfgang's both took higher scores overall than the infamous Peter Lugers - but the Brooklyn based, former crowned champs will get one last shot!
Hey Grant, we making these bets next year? I loved the incredible free steak you bought me 5 times! (compared to the mere 2 that were on me all season long) Rock on with your Red Sux and damaged credit card balance!!! "Did you ever know that you're my hero?" (as sung by Bette Midler)
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Yankees win first game in ALDS
The Yankees had the postseason in mind when they gave Sabathia the largest contract of any pitcher, believing he would come through with big performances when it counted the most. The ace did not disappoint on Wednesday, pitching into the seventh inning as the Yankees defeated the Twins, 7-2, in Game 1 of the American League Division Series.
"This is what you come here for -- to have a chance to win and pitching in the postseason, playing in October," said Sabathia, the first winning pitcher in a playoff game at the new Stadium. "It was electric tonight. It felt good. I had a lot of fun out there."
Derek Jeter and Hideki Matsui hit two-run homers for the Yankees, who also received the benefit of run-scoring hits from Alex Rodriguez and Nick Swisher to take an early advantage in the best-of-five series against Minnesota, a club against whom New York was 7-0 in the regular season.
Trusting that his offense would arrive, Sabathia struck out eight and walked none in his sixth career postseason start. The left-hander exited after 6 2/3 innings, allowing two runs (one earned) and scattering eight hits before leaning on his efficient bullpen.
"That's what we envisioned when we signed him -- CC would be pitching in late October and November," said Joe Girardi, a winner in his first game as a postseason manager. "It was the reason we got him. We thought that he could lead this staff and be the ace of this staff, and that's what he has been for us."
Friday, October 2, 2009
STK Review

This time we took our lovely ladies with us and it was quite the scene at STK on little 12th ST. Kelsey Grammer and his wife came in while we were waiting for our table. The place is pretty sweet looking and upscale cool. We ordered porterhouse for two, a filet and the tuna. The bread, heirloom tomatoes and octopus started us off and we had the mac and cheese, truffled parmesan fries and creamed spinach sides which were all pretty solid but way overpriced for their portions. Since we have been completely spoiled by some of the best steaks in the city recently our expectations did not meet reality this time. Just a solid steak, nothing special though. Pretty expensive place to be seen and shelling out $95 for porterhouse for two! I think it should sing us a Jane's Addiction song and make us do a little dance of delight! Thanks for the steak, once again Grant you are a gentleman!
Cut of meat - 5/10
Sides and desserts - 6/10
Atmosphere - 8/10
Service - 7/10
Level of debauchery allowed - 7/10
Monday, September 28, 2009
Congrats to the Yankees and Tom
Yankees Sweep Boston, Again! Win Division and Lugers Steak for Tom Kettells! Yanks Celebrate Tom's Win in the Clubhouse!

The New York Yankees clinched the American League East Division title for the first time since 2006 by beating the Boston Red Sox 4-2 to complete a three-game series sweep of their rivals and to win Tom Kettells sweet steak at Lugers.
Hideki Matsui hit a two-run single in the bottom of the sixth inning that put the Yankees ahead for good in New York, and Melky Cabrera and Mark Teixeira added solo home runs all just for Tom to win steak.
It was the 100th win for the Yankees, who open an insurmountable 8 1/2-game lead atop the AL East over the second- place Red Sox with six games left in the Major League Baseball regular season.
“It’s a great sense of accomplishment, mostly for Tom's steak win, because he deserves it after Grant Rogers talking so much shit and being gay and all, but it’s only step one,” Yankees manager Joe Girardi said in a televised interview.
After the game, the Yankees sprayed champagne in the clubhouse while celebrating their first division title in three years and Tom's overall coolness, supporting the team with his superhuman mental powers from home on the couch. New York claimed nine straight division titles from 1998 through 2006. Boston won the AL East in 2007 and the Tampa Bay Rays topped the division last season, when the Yankees finished third and missed the playoffs for the first time since 1993.
“Everybody talks about the personality, the chemistry; winning has a lot to do with that,” said Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter. “The more you win, the more fun you have, and more awesome steak for that bad motherfucker, Tom Kettells ”
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
A-Rod's winning run, Mo's 41st Save and Yankees take the Playoff Berth!!!
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Wolfgang's Review

Awesome! Grant and I enjoyed yet another great steak night provided by Grant 'cause the Red Sux have a problem winning this season and Texiera getting 80 RBI's first before Bay did!! The place is beautiful, designed by Guastavino with tiled, arched ceilings and a warm, festive atmosphere. Cold assed frosted mugs of beers started our night at the bar. We both had the thick bacon app, sides of German potatoes and creamed spinach and of course, the porterhouse for two. Wrapped it up with apple strudel with fresh schlag and we almost burst with gluttony! As the place was founded by a former Luger's waiter, they nailed all the good things about Lugers and improved on the not so great atmosphere. We agreed on most points it seems and loved the hot buttered steak with all our hearts. Why go to Brooklyn when this place was nicer and a bit less expensive than Lugers!!! One slight draw back was the corporate sausage party of douches all over the place - but what can you do? Next steak is on Grant ONCE AGAIN!!! This time at STK for CC Sabathia getting 15 wins first (And Beckett choking his substantial lead like Grant chokes his flimsey manhood). We're taking our honeys on that one so stay tuned!
Oh yeah, the bottled Wolfgang's sauce! We consumed almost 2/3 of a bottle! Different from Lugers, more like a cocktail sauce but awesome!
Tom's review numbers
Cut of meat - 9/10
Sides/desserts - 9/10
Atmosphere - 9/10
Service - 8.5/10
Level of debauchery allowed - 8/10
Thursday, September 10, 2009
I Hate Youkilis
Monday, August 24, 2009
I asked Beckett for a Steak and he came through..with SUCKING!
Yeah! Beckett and CC went head to head for "the first pitcher to get 15 wins" steak bet and CC won some steak for Tom Daddy! Yanks won the series a respectable 2 out of 3 and hold a mighty 7.5 game lead in the AL and best record in baseball!! Ask a Red Sux fan what they think and they'll reply retardedly.."Yankees Suck"!!! See last post for details. Thanks Grant- that's 3 steak wins in a row! When we getting our steak on?
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Top 5 Reasons Why the Red Sux Suck

| 1. Red Sox Sucking | |||||||
| the baseball team with the LEAST diverse and most ignorant fans. red sox fans like to show displeasure towards the yankees and their fans by constantly saying that the yankees suck, despite the fact that yankees have 39 AL pennants and 26 championships compared to boston's only 11 pennants and 7 championships. Red Sox fan: hahaha you like the yankees! they suck! Yankees fan: well, let's see. the yankees have won 26 world championships. red sox has, what was it, 7? so, shut the fuck up. Red Sox fan: uhhhhhh YANKEES SUCK! | |||||||
| 2. Red Sox Sucking | | ||||||
| Hypocrits. The Red Sox have become the new Yankees. They are no longer the "underdogs" Because once the Red Sox owner got some more money he spent it all to overpay the losers they have on there team, exactly like the yankees. And whenever you see a Red Sox fan and you try and talk baseball the first words that comes out of there mouth is "Yankees suck" as appposed to a Yankees fan who would go "Go Yankeees!" Red Sox fan: The Yankees and overpaid and stupid Yankees fan: But your team is the second most overpaid in the League, and you have only 7 world series while we have 26 Red Sox fan: Yeah, well, the Yankees choked Yankees fan: You've choked more times then us buddy Red Sox fan: Yeah, well, Yankees suck Yankees fan: Go Yankees! Red Sox fan: Yankees suck! Yankees fan: Go Yankees! Red Sox fan: Yankees suck! Angels fan: LEARN ANYTHING!? | |||||||
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| 4. Red Sox Sucking | |||||||
| The worst major league baseball team to ever play the game, if you look in their dugout after dark every other player kneeling, they are the reason people say don't drop the soap. Wow everyone was so excited about them winning the 2004 world series why? Because everyone gets excited about such rare events, come on once every 80 almost 90 years?? Fuck the red sox saddam hussein roots for your team :D the red sox are gay :D | |||||||
| 5. Red Sox Sucking | |||||||
| a pro-baseball team that is based and that plays home games in the city of Boston, MA. They are the major league baseball team for the New England area. They have 7 world championships. Their major archrival is the successful and historic New York Yankees who have 26 world championships and 39 American League championships. Red Sox fans are dubbed Red Sox Nation, assuming that no other team has a national following. They are also notoriously violent, arrogant, and prone to dangerous celebrations as seen in their world series victory after-party in the streets of Boston when over 40 were arrested and police officers were assaulted. Red Sox fans tend to frequently chant "Yankees Suck" even though the Yankees are the most successful sports team in history. The Red Sox have 7 world championships while the Yankees have 26. | |||||||
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Wednesday, August 19, 2009
15th Win Steak Dinner May Come Down To CC and Beckett on Sun Night!

This is a great game for the steak warriors to enjoy, but Grant has fantasy football draft that night. So while I'm rooting on my next free steak win with a Beckett collapse and CC victory, Grant will be dressed up like a cheerleader with a bunch of nerds who have fantasy football teams instead of watching the real game that is currently in season and really happening! Grant is now dangerously poised to pay for more free steak in my belly!
Monday, August 17, 2009
Friday, August 14, 2009
Douchebaggery Red Sux Style
God Boston fans wish they could have it every way. When they're 6.5 games behind the Yanks and struggling to be in the mix to possibly squeek by on the wildcard, they cry and cry and cry. Good luck Sux, you're gonna need it Whiner McWhinesteins!!!Buy some great shit on Boston wear here!
http://ihateboston.redsuxnation.com/
Jesus Hates The Yankees
T-shirts are now at a SALE price, among other Yankees sucks memoribilia.http://www.wackyplanet.com/jesus-hates-yankees.html
the Skankees are currently in 1st place and their fall from grace this year will be glorious. Such fair weather fans they have here in NYC.
GO SOX!
We Have A Contender!!!! Strip House Takes the Lead!
Thanks to Grant for the awesome steak dinner (Melky hitting for the cycle bet) at Strip House and for going with their house specialty, an astonishing NY Strip. We each had the 16 oz and it felt like way more than the share of meat you get from Luger's porterhouse for two. The steaks were cooked perfectly! It had a nice crisply charred outside and buttery inside. The cut was practically gristle free and stayed warm through the whole meal. Great texture and the subtle mineral taste of a prime piece of dry aged wonder. The best cut we've had yet on the tour!!! The app thick cut bacon dish was excellent although the fried potato strings were fairly weak. The sides were stars too --- the bacon and white truffle creamed spinach takes top honors of all steak houses to date! I liked the goose fat potatoes, crispy outside, soft inside. The 12 layer chocolate cake could be shared by a table of 6, so Coop got some take home, if it made it that far! Atmosphere was beautiful, service on top of everything, this place beat Lugers!!! If this place had a little more elbow room in the dinning room, strippers from Roberts and played Jane's Addiction music, we would never, ever leave!http://www.striphouse.com/
Tom's review numbers
Cut of meat - 9.5/10
Sides/desserts - 9/10
Atmosphere - 9/10
Service - 9/10
Level of debauchery allowed - 8/10
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Yanks 4 Game Sweep of the Sux!!!

Grant won't answer my text messages or phone calls anymore knowing full well it will be a humiliating kick in the crotch! The latest nut crunching came tonite when the Sux got swept all four games. They will now concentrate on not losing the wild card to Texas or Tampa Bay. They probably will. Go Yanks! Go free steaks into my belly!
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Holy Shit! Tex Wins Tom Another Free Steak from Grant!

Thanks to Jason Bay for sucking for so long and losing a 10 RBI lead! Texieria got to 80 RBI's last night WAY before Bay! Thanks Grant in advance for delicious free steak that's coming my way after I digest the "Melky hitting for a cycle" free steak from Strip House next week. Go Yanks against the Sux in the 4 game at home series! I'll be at the game tonite. See Ya!
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Holy Shit Melky Gets a Cycle!!! Awesome, Totally Awesome!!!

For the Yanks its been 14 years, for the Red Sux 13 years. The long shot bet of a steak dinner for the first team to get a cycle seemed like it wouldn't happen this or any upcoming steak bet years! But Melky Cabrera did it today and I watched as he clipped a long shot over the outfield's heads that they had to chase for just the right amount of time for Melky to get to 3rd. He had the rest of the cycle earlier in the game- the home run- the double and the single, but the triple is the hardest because of the unlikely timing involved. Thanks Melky and an all out special 'Labia grown to a small penis w/ steriods' thanks to Grant for my upcoming free steak! That will be followed by another free steak when Tex gets 3 more RBI's!!!!Awesome, Totally Awesome!!!!!!!!!! -TK
Down to the wire for a couple bets!
So things are getting interesting again! As of tonite, the Yanks are .5 games up. Jason Bay left the game to a leg injury at 74 RBI's and Tex got to 77!!! Becket logged his 13th win and Wakefield (11 wins) is still out on the DL. If Sabathia wins tomorrow he's at 11 wins too. Overall looking good for Tommy K to get the next free steak when Tex gets his 80th RBI before Bay does. Looking like Yanks need Beckett to meltdown and give many unanswered wins to Sabathia if additional free steak is to come my way for the first pitcher to get to 15 wins. What do you think Dick Grown From Labia Tissue Boy?
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Red Sux Cheaters Cheated to Win '04 World Series!!!!

Times: Manny, Ortiz tested positive in '03
Boston Red Sox slugger David Ortiz confirmed on Thursday that he tested positive for the use of performance-enhancing drugs, during Major League Baseball's 2003 survey testing season, he said in a statement released by the club.
The report surfaced Thursday morning in a story first published on The New York Times' Web site. According to lawyers who spoke to the Times, and whose names were not revealed, Ortiz and Manny Ramirez are on the list of 104 players who tested positive, testing that was agreed to and conducted only on the condition that the results would remain anonymous.
Ortiz and Ramirez were members of the Red Sox at the time and in 2004 helped the club end an 86-year streak in which they hadn't won a World Series.
Grant's Review of Robert's Steakhouse
Robert's Steakhouse - Inside of the Penthouse Executive ClubOur visit here was a bit delayed from the start. We had made reservations, just for 2, at 8PM. There was a large party that came with 10 more people than expected and took up an entire section. We had to wait at the bar until at least 9:15. The host did buy a few rounds on the house to make up for it, but it was still annoying to stand there when you are starving. The view wasn't bad though.
I suppose I'll start with the cut. We ordered the porterhouse for two, like we have at most of these steak houses. It was a good piece, but that's about it. It was well below any of the steak houses we've been too. It was a bit hard to chew at some points, more fatty/gristley than I'd care for. They did have a different type of dipping sauce, that we had not seen before, that was very tasty. It was still a great steak, don't get me wrong, but it was just not up to par with the other places we've been.
Robert's shining moment as far, as the food goes, was there Au Grautin Potatoes side dish. Hands down the best Potato dish I've tasted. We also got the standard creamed spinach and to our surprise and delight, was a bit more spinachy than creamy. I'd also like to mention they poured our water from a big ass pewter jug in the shape of a tiger. You can't get any more awesome than that.
It it a completely different experience eating a steak in this enviornment, one that I think everyone should do at lease once. It takes some getting used to having naked girls grinding on some dude AT THE NEXT TABLE while you are enjoying dinner. I don't think any steak house is going to get a better rating in the level of debauchery category.
Grant's ratings for Robert's:
Cut of meat - 5/10
Sides and desserts - 6/10
Atmosphere - 8/10
Service - 3/10
Level of debauchery allowed - 10/10
Go Sox!
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Varitek is a bottom!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Sad, Red Sux Clown Shit Sandwich

Grant's having to deal with the harsh reality that the Yanks are undefeated 6-0 after the All Star Break and the Sux are 1-5. Wow! Eat a sad clown shit sandwich for lunch Grant and enjoy the last awesome steak dinner win tonite at Roberts! Oh yeah, and the Yanks are 2 up and alone in 1ST PLACE!!! Go Yanks!
Monday, July 13, 2009
Grant won All Star Break Bet- They all rejoice with Glee
Congrats Grant! Our very coveted Best Record at the All Star Break bet was won by you! It all came down to the last three games after the Yankees won 13 out of 15 and Boston won about half their games, making it even. Yanks then had to play a stellar team in the LA Angels for the last series. Angels are damn good and took all three games. Boston had to play a little league team called the KC Rectums or something and Boston lost the first game only to barely win each proceeding game by a point or so. Congrats Boston! You won the special Olympics! We will kill you the rest of the year!!!!-Sourgrapes Kettells
Friday, July 10, 2009
Grant's prediction for the end of the year
I really like that the Red Sox are giving the retarded yanks some hope. Because we all know that they will lose 3 straight to the Angels thus giving us the division going into the All-Star break. Not to mention we have this division, the American league, and the world series wrapped up once we get all of our players healthy.Go Sox.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Season Series Perfection With Twins! Yankees Now Tied with Red Sux Because Well...Youkilis Is Lame- Got The Last Out And They Suck!!!

With Thursday's 6-4 victory, the Bombers capped a perfect 7-0 record against the Twins in '09, sweeping the season series. The Yanks have also now won 13 of their past 15 games.
How will the Sux do against an inferior team like KC? Probably lose a couple games and place free steak in my belly right Grant?
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Review of Old Homestead
I've had several cuts of meat there and they are all superb. Their sides are great as well. There is one side of these garlic bread things that come in a Jenga-like structure just covered and dripping in cheese. It is phenomenal.
The atmosphere is a bit higher class than Lugers, but not as much as Craftsteak. You can still get a simple cold beer here, which is always a plus for me.
My ratings:
Cut of meat - 7/10
Sides/desserts - 8/10
Atmosphere - 6/10
Service - 8/10
Level of debauchery allowed - 7/10
Go Sox.
Tom it's okay to be gay
Tom volunteered as a roadie for Tom Robinson way back when.
He got paid in free ass munchings. That's cool.
Tom and the Yankees seem to think they will have a better record at the all star break than the Red Sox. The Sox are showmen. They are just losing a few games and making it interesting for the fans. They have this division locked up. Plus when Bay hits 80 RBIs it'll be 2 steak meals right after each other....for free...paid for by Tom.
Grant's Review of Craftsteak

Look how sad Posada is. It's okay little buddy, he's just a better catcher than you.

And let us not forget this historic punch to pretty boy's face.


What a pansy, A-Rod is. JV is a certified bad ass.

I digress. Varitek hitting that Grand Slam made me the proud winner of one steak night courtesy of Tom. The steak house of choice: Craftsteak. ( http://www.craftrestaurant.com/craftsteak_newyork.html )
Craftsteak's atmosphere is very high class and elegant. They have a few house signature cocktails that were yummy (and expensive.) However, you can't just get a regular cold beer, either. They have a very limited selection of some beer whose name I can't pronounce. It's not really my style as far as atmosphere goes. I want to be able to tell a fart/poop joke loudly and not get dirty looks from high society. There were about 10 different servers/waiters that came to our table. I'm not complaining about the service because it was great, but it just got confusing. If you're into the swankier places to dine, then this is your place. We happened to see Renee Zelwegger walk in and sit down, so you'll be in "good company". On a side note, her face is not all that messed up in real life.
First, the cut was what you would expect from a top steak house. It was definitely on par with Lugers. It wasn't spectacular by any means, but solid. We ordered the spinach (which was not creamed) and the mashed potatoes. They were not that appealing. They had a wide variety of sauces to go with the cut as well, which was new to me. All very different and tasty.
In my opinion the dessert is where Crafsteak shines. We ordered their home made donuts as well as their monkey bread (which is essentially a dope ass cinamon roll type thing). I have a huge sweet tooth and it put me in sugar coma. It was great.
All in all it was a very nice place to eat. The food was a bit above average and desert gets a gold star. I believe Tom and I worked out how we are going to rate each steak house. We have 5 categories and each get a rating 1 thru 10. Then we average our numbers together to get the final results.
Grant's results for craftsteak:
Cut of meat - 6/10
Sides and desserts - 7/10
Atmosphere - 4/10
Service - 6/10
Level of debauchery allowed - 1/10
Go sox.
Grant's true passion
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Keens review by Tom K meal paid for by Grant R

Grant was generous enough to purchase a fine meal at Keens due to the magnitude of Boston sucking and Mark Teixeira getting 20 home runs before Jason Bay did.
The place is an old school - blow your executive expense account- hundred plus years old-type place with antique clay pipes decorating the ceiling with an overall warm wood aesthetic. I liked the feel better than at Luger's. I guess Grant wanted a picnic table, rude old waiters and bright lights or something. I think we both agreed the cut of porterhouse we got that night was superior to Peter Luger's, based on very low gristle and fat content.
Grant cried they didn't have Peter Luger sauce and I almost punched his spine. They did have a decent red wine reduction sauce and some bernaise that at least made Grant pull up his lace panties and continue eating. The hash brown side was awesome as was the crab cake appetizer. Bread and spinach were average and the dessert we tried was the caramel sundae which is hard to fuck up and tasted very nice. The steak was not boiling in butter like at Lugers and was cold very quickly although it was a lot less fatty.
Steak Cut/Experience 9/10
Sides/Desserts 7/10
Atmosphere 7/10
Service 7/10
Debauchery Level 6/10
Overall just fell short of Lugers, though a nice goddamn meal!!!!
Great Steak Update

As you already know Grant and I are wagering our hard earned cash for bragging rights and more importantly perfectly cooked bovine flesh. As of this post, Texiera upped the RBI's to 60 to Bay's 69 for the first to get 80 RBI bet. If we win tonite, Yankees are just trailing by 3 games with about 13 to go to the All-Star break bet of best record by July 14th. Burnette was awesome and was one hit short of the no hitter bet yesterday. The heat is on Rogers!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Tit for Tat
Grant being from Nebraska and all and not exposed to a whole hell of a lot til like last year understandably thinks Lugers is the end and be all of steaks. He could be right... Our 2009 Yankees Red Sux Steak Tour should provide some insight to all this. Then again, he also thinks this is a baseball fan..We, who were not so lucky to be born corn fed and live in a fly over state, know this to be a proper fan...Bring on the games!













